Weighed and Measured

Whoa!

A Heart Mom is threatening to go ballistic on someone:

I told my husband what had happened and of course his solution to the problem involved me waving around my giant stick and teaching them a valuable lesson about staring at our small child.  While that approach may have gotten some results, not to mention cause a pretty big scene, it wasn’t one that I felt was appropriate for our children to be witness to.

Good thing she kept her wits about her. Local law enforcement authorities usually don’t take kindly to people waving large sticks in public, no matter what the reason. The point of conflict here – as you may guess – was a group of people who seemed to have nothing better to do than to stare at her Cardiac Kid’s scars. It turned into a real whisper-fest, and even though the child was a bit young to recognize what was happening, Mom saw it. And the steam was coming out of her ears.

“You have been weighed, you have been measured, and you have been found wanting. In what world could you possibly beat me?” – A Knight’s Tale, 2001

The basis for this line is from the scriptures, specifically Daniel 5:27 – Thou art weighed in the balances, and art found wanting. The King wasn’t good enough, so God slammed the door on his kingdom, and that very night the King perished. And that is exactly what was happening here: the local wags had seen the scar on her son’s chest; they had decided that he was…. different, somehow, and that wasn’t a good thing; and they had instantly judged that neither he nor his mom were part of the Cool Crew. Too bad, so sad. And as much as I hate to say it, that’s a fairly common reaction.

The hardest battle a Cardiac Kid has to fight will not happen in an operating room, but rather in their schoolyard playground. Kids aren’t necessarily mean, but they are brutally honest. You don’t ask “What happened to your chest?” or “Why you got to get tired all the time?” and they will stare – they’re children, after all. You sort of understand that this is the way children usually act. And Cardiac Kids have to fight these battles all own their on, just like everyone else. It’s how children learn to interact with other people, and hopefully grow past that stage.

But adults judging little kids? NOW we’ve got a problem.

Bring that behavior here, and I’m just crazy enough to start quoting Shakespeare: “Then will he strip his sleeve and show his scars, and say `These wounds I had on Crispian’s day’…We few, we happy few, we band of brothers (and sisters!), for he who sheds his blood with me shall be my brother.”

You see, no matter what snap judgement you may make of that kid with the scar, we see ourselves as survivors. And no matter what you may think, we weigh out correctly and we measure up.

And this is the story that a good man will teach his son.

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One Response to “Weighed and Measured”

  1. Stefenie Says:

    Steve,
    Thanks for sharing my post and linking it to your blog. I hope it helps other heart families to know that they aren’t the only ones that have encountered this.

    I loved your quote from a Knight’s Tale. Very fitting.

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